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There will come a time when one family member passes on, and this is usually the time where questions regarding the funeral of the deceased arise. It shouldn’t be much of a problem for those whose faith has fixed death customs, but this isn’t the case for Buddhists.

In our Malaysian Buddhist way of life upon death, there are only two categories of funeral rites: either adopting a Buddhist funeral rite or a Taoist funeral rite. Choosing the correct funeral ceremony is crucial as this will affect the status of the deceased soul, and it is to our sad observation that there is still a lot of confusion and myths concerning Buddhist funerals.

Let us go through how to decide whether one should go for Buddhist funeral practices, and clear the myths surrounding the Buddhist funeral ceremony.

The Reality of Choosing Buddhist Funeral Rites, and Why They Are Not for Everyone

Presently, many would prefer Buddhist funeral customs upon death due to the ongoing trend as well as the simpler ritual. On the personal side of the funeral director, it would be easier to conduct and cleaner in ritual.

Unfortunately, the real situation is that the deceased would be in a great dilemma IF:-

• the deceased was a person who believed in deity rituals only,
• the deceased, when alive, did not observe any form of Bodhisattva or Buddha respect,
• the deceased, when alive, had never once or rarely listened to the Dharma,
• the deceased, when alive, had never or rarely done any daily chanting of both Sutras and Mantras.

The absence of actions such as listening to the Dharma and chanting sutras and mantras would be tantamount to forsaking Buddhism, hence, it is not appropriate to hold a Buddhist rite funeral for the deceased.

To make it even clearer, subjecting the deceased who was a firm believer in Deitism to Buddhist death rituals for the funeral is akin to inserting a square peg into a round hole.

So what happens if you continue to do so despite the unsuitability of such rites for the deceased? In the end, the deceased would be at a loss and fail to go back to its original place of journey.

Sadly, many funeral directors are unaware of such predicament that many departed souls are facing due to the mismatched ritual conduct. It is like the situation where we grow up reading and using English as our main medium of communication then suddenly we are given instructions in Mandarin words; undoubtedly we will be at a loss over its comprehension as well.

Similarly, when one is a person who always consumes meat, plays lottery numbers a lot, prays to deities, and has never stepped into any Buddhist temples to pay respect, then one is very unsuitable to follow the Buddhist funeral rite upon death.

Also read: Is There Life After Death?

Biggest Myths Surrounding Buddhist Funerals

Myth #1: Buddhist Funeral Customs Are Better than the Taoist Funeral Rites

Many have the belief that the Buddhist funeral way of rite is a higher level of conduct for the deceased regardless of whether one is truly a Buddhist firm believer, since they believe that going for the Buddhist way of funeral is an affirmation for the deceased to reach a higher state of attainment.

Also read: The Myth of Theravada Buddhism as The Highest Attainment

We have to emphasize – it is purely a myth to believe that conducting a Buddhist funeral ritual paves the way to reach a higher realm than the Taoist death ritual. This is completely Wrong Understanding!

The onset is actually our own successful cultivation and training to achieve our own spiritual attainment, not merely rely on trends and blind beliefs. After all, a funeral rite’s objective is to ensure the deceased is accorded a proper farewell and given last respect during bereavement, and a Buddhist funeral ceremony should never be considered a guaranteed ticket to the heavenly realms or Pureland.

Myth #2: A Grand Buddhist Death Ceremony is Necessary, and the Deceased Automatically Knows Where to Go in the Afterlife

People are always giving priority to ensuring the death ceremony is conducted pompously to show off one has a high standing in status or wealth. Many spent hundreds of thousands of dollars to give a grand reception to the public when the core of the funeral rite is to ensure the deceased is well guided into the next journey smoothly and if possible, successfully attained into the next higher spiritual realm.

Unfortunately, this is never intended in many people’s mind, and everyone just simply joined the wagon of deception and illusion.

In that case, what should be the proper way to conduct the funeral according to Buddhist funeral traditions? One should always arrange to seek Buddhist associations and Buddhist temples’ services to help recite important sutras and mantras that can assist the deceased to feel calm and serene.

When the deceased soul is in a tranquil state, this will then help to prepare the deceased to move forward to the next world with ease. It is certainly a myth to think that all deceased are automatically guided into the next world. In reality, afterlife guidance is only shown if one has truly cultivated and trained successfully in one’s lifetime before one’s passing.

Myth #3: Placing the Wang Sheng Zhou 往生咒 Buddhist Mantra Yellow Cloth and Saffron Robe on the Coffin Will Ease the Deceased’s Transition to the Afterlife

Through all the past experiences and observations, one should always get prepared to enter the next world upon departure through daily chanting of both sutras and mantras regardless of whether one is a Buddhist or Taoist in order to assist oneself to have a smooth journey to the afterlife.

It is like we have to go to school to learn regardless we are Chinese, Indian, European or American. The ability to master both sutras and mantras by chanting is a great foundation to assist us in moving smoothly into the next journey upon our death.

Unfortunately, people these days end up practicing the illusionary view and myth of putting saffron robes and the Wang Sheng Zhou Buddhist mantra yellow cloth (往生咒) onto the cover of the coffin in hopes of giving extra merits to the deceased and ensuring the deceased can attain the Pureland Realm.

The truth is, this will only discredit the merits for the deceased as saffron robes are sacred in the teachings of the Buddha. It is also considered an act of great disrespect, mocking the sacredness of the saffron robes when you place it onto the cover of the coffin instead of offering it directly to the order of the Sangha.

What You Should Do After The Buddhist Funeral Rite

It is surprising to know many Buddhist laities do not know what they should do after holding a Buddhist funeral.

It is important to observe the rules of Buddhist rites, which is to ensure after the first 7th day, all must reprieve the mourning pin (孝) on our shoulder and burn it along with the coffin. This is a sign of returning to normalization.

Upon normalization, one has to wash the hair clean and then go to any Buddhist temple to cleanse the body. The simple cleansing ritual consists of making 3 clockwise rounds of the temple premise followed by 4 anticlockwise rounds to complete the whole process.

When all these actions are done, only then is one considered back to normal in living and can freely attend any function or visit other temples. Also, in any Buddhist rite, after 49 days of neutralization, one can freely attend grand happy occasions such as weddings and birthday parties.

The Importance of Planning Your Buddhist Funeral in Advance

As the saying goes, everything is impermanent and subject to decay and death. So is our life; it is always never permanent and life can go off at any time and moment. That is why we should always take priority in handling our next journey upon death with care.

Hence, it is important to plan ahead of our impending death by giving clear instructions to our next of kin or immediate family members regarding our funeral rite wishes upon death, such as conducting a Taoist or Buddhist funeral rite, as well as matters pertaining to our will and the division of properties or wealth.

However, even today, it is difficult to implement such instructions due to traditional Chinese taboos that it is considered bad luck to talk about death, thereby creating a deep problem whenever someone dies suddenly and leaves behind everything in jeopardy. This is the reason they face the end result whereby one who truly needs a Buddhist funeral rite ends up with a Taoist funeral ritual while the deceased who needs a Taoist ceremony badly is given a Buddhist rite instead.

And the saddest outcome of the unnecessary mixed-up ceremony is that, many souls become stranded on this Earth yet they are unable to voice their afterlife troubles to the living. On the other hand, the living continues thinking they did the right thing and that the deceased souls are already well taken care of and have departed smoothly from this world. Such is the pitiful situation that is happening rampantly nowadays.

We hope this article sheds some light on Buddhist funeral customs and proper practices. If you have further questions about the topic, we welcome enquiries – feel free to contact us for more information.